Sign me up!
But I'm not gonna lie when I saw the alert for a "Tuf Skinz" group buy; my heart started racing and my pants got a little tight. I genuinely thought the admins had finally listened to my requests and secured a bulk discount on industrial-strength, Kevlar-lined prophylactics for the absolute hogs on this forum.
Imagine my soul-crushing disappointment when I opened the thread and realized we’re buying gear instead of heavy-duty, ribbed meat-sleeves. My disappointment is immeasurable, and my day is ruined.
Frankly, I feel misled. But don't worry, boys—if anyone is
actually in the market for a tough skin, just slide into my DMs. I’ve been practicing strictly dry-friction maneuvers since I can remember, and my foreskin has built up enough calluses to deflect small arms fire.